Self Care vs. Selfishness
How do we take care of ourselves if we continue to believe that choosing to make ourselves a priority is selfish? Let us help clear up some things. Usually when sharing the importance of choosing to invest in yourself, a comment response is “but isn’t that selfish?”
This has us looking at what TRUE self-care is. Culture teaches us that it’s face masks and fancy vacations, when really, it’s anything that is life-giving to you. Think: reading a good book, going out with a friend, getting out of the house into nature, etc. It looks unique to each person, as well as changes during different seasons of life where you might have to adjust.
Selfishness is neglecting others’ feelings because you’re so focused on your own. Self-care is taking care of yourself so that you avoid burnout and continue to live your beautiful life to the fullest!
Selfishness
Self-Care
Feeding one’s own needs in order to rejuvenate and restore energy to continue their life’s roles effectively and healthily, physically, mentally and emotionally.
Examples:
Moving the body
Spending time in prayer
Overly concerned with oneself, seeking out one’s own pleasure, sometimes at the expense of someone else.
Examples:
Time away/avoiding responsibilities expecting others to fulfill them
Not respecting other’s time
Tone and energy also offer important distinctions between whether something falls into the category of self-care or selfishness. Consider how you are communicating your needs.
Self-care may sound like: “I need 10 minutes to transition from work mode to home mode so that I can be fully present for you and the kids.”
Selfishness sounds like: “Can’t you see I just got home from work and need a moment before debriefing and playing with the kids?
When it comes to communicating needs, keep it clear, simple and loving. Even during times of stress, resist the trap of expecting anyone to anticipate your needs. Ask yourself: what does self-care look like to you in this season?
Self-care changes day to day. It’s your responsibility to cultivate awareness for what that looks like, but I’m always happy to help you learn and grow! Reach out for ideas, support and accountability.
